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Their kin log on to share thoughts, find healing

Jody Wood never thought she would live to see her son die.

She still can't comprehend the nightmare of losing Ronnie to war. Since that day last summer, Wood clings to anything that reminds her of him.
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She drove all the way from Colorado to Brigham City with her husband, Ronald Wood Sr., to welcome home the Utah National Guard's 1-148th Field Artillery Battalion a couple of weeks ago. Her son should have been part of the welcome-home festivities. But Sgt. 1st Class Ronald Wood, 28, of Cedar City, died July 16 when his armored military Humvee struck a roadside bomb in Kirkuk, Iraq.

She misses the sound of his voice, the twinkle in his eye, the courage of his soul.

So she writes. She writes in a small journal that sits on the Wood family kitchen table, where she and other members of the family tell Ronnie of special memories and spiritual experiences they've had since that July day.

"We are so proud of him, and we miss him every second of every day that we live on without him in our lives," Wood said.

She also writes in a much more public setting, one where millions of Internet users can read her thoughts and share their feelings about the soldier that gave up his life for his country.

Sgt. 1st Class Ronald Wood is one of thousands of servicemen memorialized on Web sites like Legacy.com's "In Remembrance," fallenheroesmemorial.com, mem.com and other sites where strangers, friends and family can offer condolences and swap memories of the fallen.

"He was our hero, and now he is a true blue national hero to everyone," Jody and Ron Wood Sr. wrote on the Legacy.com memorial site. "There was never a more perfect human being or more loyal soldier than Ronnie."

Her son's memorial on Legacy.com's "In Remembrance" section is a form of therapy for Wood. Comments on the nearly four pages of listings tell the story of a brave man who earned the respect of his fellow soldiers.

One message, from the wife of a soldier in his unit, said since Ronnie's death, it has taken five to six soldiers 18 hours a day to do the work Ronnie did.

"Ronnie has an amazing spirit that will be with us forever," Trudy Reber, of Cedar City, wrote. "We feel privileged and blessed to have known him."

Messages like that carry Colleen Parkin through the day. Her son, Cpl. Matthew Reed Smith, died Jan. 26 in the deadliest helicopter crash in more than two years of combat in Iraq. In total, 30 Marines and a Navy medic died after the CH-53E Super Stallion went down in a sand storm. Shortly after his death, a family friend set up a Web site, www.remembermatt.com, complete with pictures, stories, anecdotes and an online message board.

Parkin said she was particularly touched by a message from a 14-year-old boy who didn't even know her son, yet thanked him for his service. The boy told the family, "I am deeply sorry about the loss of your son."

"People who don't even know him appreciate his sacrifice and what he did for our country," Parkin said. "It helps me see there are people out there that do appreciate it and are grateful. They do remember there is a war over there and people are losing their lives for it."

For Mike Cawley, the memorial sites are another way to cling to the memory of his brother.

Staff Sgt. James Cawley was the first Utahn to die in Iraq. The former Salt Lake City police officer was killed March 28, 2003, when he was struck by a Coalition Humvee near the Iraqi city of Nasiriyah.

Scott G. Winterton, Deseret Morning NewsRonald Wood, left, Jody Wood and Ronnie Jr.'s brother Nathan stand and thank the returning troops from the National Guard's 1-148th Field Artillery Battalion in Brigham City in November. On occasion, Mike Cawley will visit the online memorials and write a letter to his brother, telling him how much he loves and misses him. But most of the time, he reads. Cawley said he enjoys reading messages on the sites from other soldiers or police officers who served with his brother.

"Their stories give me something to hold on to, more to remember him by, one more thing to laugh or be proud about. Each new story makes his life larger and longer. It keeps him alive, as if he were still here," he said.

"They don't make the pain go away. The hole in your heart will always be there. Your heart is hurt, and the ability to love and laugh and carry on is hurt. These sites don't and can't heal the damage. What they do is make your heart bigger."

Copyright © 2005. Deseret Morning News.